This season's Tell All was just not that exciting, you guys. I mean, it had a few moments which we'll get to, but over all there was just a lot of apologizing and being nice and making up and that is not good TV.
Okay, so first of all, what I want to know is: why is the "chicken enthusiast" on the panel? Didn't she leave the very first night? And I was going to ask why she would bring her chicken -apparently named Sheila- along for the Tell All ride, but let's be real: no one would have any idea who she was otherwise.
So we dive right into the
entire reason for watching The Bachelor drama with clips of Olivia snarking, Jubilee sulking and Leah the Liar...well, lying. Leah attempts to defend her decision to throw Lauren under the nearest semi-truck and then play innocent bystander by saying it was because she felt "overshadowed." No sympathy is forthcoming from either the panel or the audience so she kind of mutters something about how she and Lauren are "good now" so it's fine.
Next the girls -by which I mean Amber who desperately needs the assistance of a good bra and Jaime (who?)- have a bone to pick with Jubilee. Apparently they take serious issue with some of the comments Jubilee made in the house, such as referring to herself as "full black." Um, she is black, so......whatever, mean girls. I guess I don't get it. Still #TeamJubilee over here.
Now Lace is in the hot seat. Oh Lace, how we've missed your third person references and brand of all around cray. And hey look, so did the rando guy who got your face tattooed on his beer gut! Thanks to Chris Harrison we can all look forward to the Lace shenanigans that are sure to spice up Bachelor in Paradise this summer.
Miss Olivia "I wanna talk smart things" has her turn on center stage next (thank the good lord there's no cake or feathers in sight) and attempts this sort of combo of giving herself compliments while trying to make amends for her condescending attitude toward the other girls. (She's just misunderstood, you guys! She's just not good at this Bachelor thing!) Amanda and one of the Mystery Twins clearly aren't buying what she's selling, and actually start laughing.
Olivia -not surprisingly- is in the hot seat for awhile, but the gist is this: a few tears are shed, Olivia confesses she was "severely bullied" as a kid, someone called Izzy (who the hell are you??) doesn't believe her and eventually apologies are given and accepted and everyone can go back to taking their #BachelorNation group selfies now.
And now we've come to Caila, our resident hair-flipper and most recent broken-hearted Bachelor dump-ee.
I really do feel bad for Caila, but what I notice most about her interview is how many times she says "It's just really hard." I didn't keep a tally, but she says it enough that even Charlie Sheen could turn it into a drinking game and get seriously plastered. Which is probably what Caila needs to do right about now.
The star of the show finally makes his appearance and is welcomed by Chris Harrison pointing out that Bens in quite a mess with all the love-talk he's been spewing!
And then the girls get to have at 'im! As Leah calls Ben out for tattling on her to Lauren, my husband walks into the living room, sits down and then immediately gets up and leaves. He definitely can't hang with The Bachelor drama, but that's okay, cause it's a wrap!
I have a feeling next week's finale will be the juiciest yet! Until then Bachelor Nation!